INSEAD Funding - Ugh

Sitting, dreaming about being in Singapore I realized I had to find funding SOON. Really there are only 1 or 2 options if you are a Canadian living in the US. The first issue is that all the US federal loans require you to be an American Citizen or a Green Card holder to apply....so unfortuantely unless I marry an American within the next 15 days, I don't qualify, and even if that happens (as all you prospective ladies send your applications), it would probably take a month or two for all the paperwork to clear. Feel free to send applications anyways :)

So really you have only a couple of choices:
1) IEFC Loan through TERI
2) PARAS Foundation Loan
3) Private Bank Loan

Paras is an Indian foundation that provides loans, but their whole application system looks really sketchy. Also the amounts they may charge for your loan are not clear and may depend on millions of factors, which of course they choose not to disclose. I'm sure they are good and trustworthy, it's just there is not much information about them out there so it is hard to take that plunge. ALso their origination fees are high.

Getting a Private Bank loan is really not an option if you don't own property and have your own line-of-credit. I don't own a house, so I'm pretty much not eligible unless i can throw down some serious capital. I can't, so i'm SOL

Lastly there is the IEFC loan option. If you are an alien in the US (WTF????) then you can apply for a loan with an eligible co-signer (US Citizen). Three banks provide loans through IEFC and each has it's own pros and cons. 2 of the banks provide LIBOR + 2-3% rates, but they have high origination fees of around 6%. The other bank can give you 0% origination fees depending on your credit, but it's rate is Prime + 1%. So it's a bit of a toss up. Either way you lose.

Option F has you finding a rich relative that can sponsor your tuition :)
Option G = Sugar Momma

So far I'm still looking for Option F or G, so looks like I will have to go with the IEFC.

As for Scholarships...well:
a) I'm lazy and can't be bothered writing 20 essays
b) I don't know how to justify that I'm in a financial crisis when I have a good job, parents are doing fine as well, have some investments etc...

So we'll see how that goes, though I did find one for Canadians that is basically a loan given to students for X amount htat you are expected to pay back to the organization when complete. Also you must have the "intention" of returning to Canada. Now...hmmm...I do have the intention of coming back someday...just not in the next 5 years..lol. Does that count?